New York was amazing. It always is, and each time I go back I fall in love with it more and more. Plenty of memorable experiences had in a very short amount of time. Even drove a car in Manhattan- yes, I'm crazy.
While the real purpose of the trip did not turn out the way I might have wanted it to, it did provide me with a lot of context. So much in fact, that I have a few things to consider in the next few months.
As I got back into San Francisco, the weather was horrible and it matched my mood. I needed to refocus on what's going to happen next.
Have you ever had a moment in your life where you have felt like you have unlimited options? That's the point in time I'm facing currently. I've been shackled by my family, my ex-husband and other "things" that I assumed had held me back previously. Now, there is really nothing that can get me down. I'm not sure where or what I'm going to be doing in ninety days, or tomorrow- but trust me when I tell you that you will be one to know!
Now, some things that I learned while in NY:
- NY focuses more on intelligence, while LA focuses on appearance.
- Men in NY love the backside (AKA as a woman's ass... No problem there!).
- A window front with a red neon sign that reads "Psychic" isn't always a Psychic.
- Do not order a Chai Tea Latte in NY. Stick to coffee.
- Driving in NY is not as bad as it looks, just go with the flow of traffic and react fast. You'll be fine.
- I could get lost on a long drive down the West Side Highway
- Beware of the Holland Tunnel (Hello New Jersey!).
- Central Park is romantic. There I said it. I'm not such a non-romantic person after all.
- ALWAYS have a Plan B. You never know when you need it.
Moving on...
The week has been rather uneventful otherwise, with the exception of my ex-husband who insisted that I send him a box of his belongings before he signs my divorce papers. Well I'm going to do better than that! I'm going to take all of his goodies back to LA! When I mentioned this, he seemed to brush the idea of it off. Wonder what he'll do when his mother has the key to the storage unit. According to my predictions. I should be divorced by July.
Next, let's talk sex and orgasms.
Whoa-- right? Yes, I said it. Let's talk about it.
This afternoon I was drinking a cup of coffee, and overhearing some witty banter on the television somewhere between Meet the Press, The Real Housewives of NY, Face the Nation and the Millionaire Matchmaker. The premise of the banter had something to do with relationships. I tuned in one ear to it, and the other ear to the music I was listening to.
Did I also mention that I was simultaneously downloading a hard drive for a friend of mine before he takes a long trip too? Geezus- I was working on like 10 things!
Anyway, somewhere in all of that banter was one of the wisest deductions that I'd heard in a bit. Ready for it? Ok, here we go....
"Once you have one good orgasm with a man, whether he be the right or wrong one for a relationship, you're fucked; figuratively and literally."
I took this bit of wisdom and sent it to my closest female friends who responded to like this:
"Now that is some funny shit!"
"All I can say is you're ABSOLUTELY right..."
"No wonder I'm a mess..."
"Tell me something I don't know"
Now, is it a surprise when I say that you can have sex with someone and not be attached? It just has to be BAD sex.
Bad sex is usually a reason to not have an orgasm. Better yet, it's the best reason women do not become attached to men.
So in my assessment, I started thinking. I've had good sex, bad sex and OMG sex. I can count on my hands with whom I've had mind blowing orgasms with- and it was all with OMG sex-- and yes, I was fucked literally and figuratively.
(And for the sake of this blog, the number I can count is less than 10% of the sex I've had. Yes, I said that too.)
That got me to thinking, so what if you took the time to contact one of the guys who you shared the OMG moment with? What if you just said, "Hey, remember that time? Yeah, so I just want you to know that you were the producer of one of the most mind blowing orgasms I've ever had. Here's a medal and a thank you note..."
HA! That's crazy! I'm totally losing it! But seriously, what *IF* you took a minute to say thanks, especially if you don't talk regularly anymore OR if you do, maybe they never had an idea.
So, I reached out to five of my closest male friends and asked them what they would think if a woman came to them with this information. These friends were in age range of 25 to 45 years old.
I was sorta shocked by the responses, but I'll explain why at the end.
Here's some of the goods:
"I'm gonna plead the fifth on this one..."
"I would call her a liar, unless she was 16..."
"Knowing that no matter what I stand out is a confidence boost. It means I have a shot of being in the game, if you know what I mean..."
"How fucking lucky am I?
"Does she want a relationship?"
Good lord, seriously? Men, do you get it? A WOMAN who you all assume to know how to PLAY is giving you a COMPLIMENT on how you made her toes CURL and all you can do is QUESTION HER MOTIVES?
I had to reach deep for this one folks, no lie. I went back to these guys, who I all love dearly, and re-ask the question just so they understood why it was so important to a woman when they have an orgasm.
Sure, men have it all the time. They have to-- or else its not over for them. I've actually had one guy who asked me why I didn't (ok, ok, TMI-- but in comparison to ulterior motives, he was genuinely interested...).
Once explained, the men I polled got it. They were the MAN, literally.
It's not very often that women even acknowledge openly when a man has given her the big "O". Think about the movie When Harry met Sally, and Meg Ryan in the coffee shop reenacting her "YES, YES.." scene. The person next to her says, "I'll have what she's having...", because we all want the big "O". Women fake it too often because their partners don't know how to get it done. Men assume it's always been fake-- so what happens when it really isn't fake anymore, but a reality. Well, you've got yourself some stunned fellas, let me tell you.
I mentioned to a friend that maybe I should write those guys a letter and send them a medal just so they know that they were the men who did it for me. He said, "Lucky Guys..." Really? Were they lucky, or was I the lucky one?
Eventually, for those I maintain contact with-- I will let them know. It's a boost to the ego, just like a woman loves to hear they're the best lover a man has ever had.
Now, I need to start designing that medal....
No comments:
Post a Comment